We are in this article continuing with our series on
friendship; focusing on the second category of friends which I call them the
negative influencers. I want to once
again reiterate the point that, the people we meet in the path of life either
contributes positively or negatively to our lives.
The story of Rehoboam in 2 Chronicles 10, presents to us
a clear picture of this category of friends. After the death of his father Solomon,
and his subsequent ascension to the throne as the king, the people of Israel
approached Rehoboam to plead for a reduction in the workload put on them by his
father. In return, the People pledged their unflinching support and loyalty for
their new king.
Rehoboam upon consulting the council of elders was
advised to heed to the request of the people to lessen the burden on the people;
but this he ignored. He rather went ahead and sought counsel from the young men
he had grown up with. He was however ill-advised by these young men: a decision
which consequently led to Israel’s rebellion against him.
Rehoboam was supposed to have been a king over the
twelve tribes of Israel as was the case during the reign of his father, Solomon
and his grandfather, David. Sadly enough, he ended up with only two out of the
twelve due to this single incidence of negative influence of his friends in his
life.
As was with Rehoboam, negative people are toxic to our
lives and their influence can cost us greatly. As the name implies, these group
of people influence lives negatively and take value out of your life. These are
the ‘enticing people’ the Bible talks about in Proverbs 1:10. The 15-16 (NIV) says,
“my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths; for their
feet rush into sin…” Characteristics of these people include the following:
- They seek self-gratification i.e. they are selfish and seek their interest first above anyone else.
- Their loyalty ends where their benefits stop. ( Proverbs 19:4,6,7)
- They seek worldly pleasure and ultimately draw you away from God. ( Proverbs 1: 10-16)
- They do not seem to have any aim in life and usually want to discourage you anytime you seek to improve yourself. As the late Dr Monroe would say, “these people who aren’t going anywhere usually want to take you along with them.”
- Their counsel leads to destruction e.g. as in the case of Rehoboam.
- You have to put up ‘a certain’ kind of life in order to measure up to them
- They exhibit symptoms of deep-seated jealousy. They pretend to celebrate with when in actual fact they wish they had what you had or were in your position.
- They stab you at the back. They often gossip about you to other friends.
It is important to avoid these people as they distract
you from your goals in life and they are capable of derailing you from
achieving the purpose of God for your life. In as much as the Christian youth
is the light of the world and is meant
to be a good influence to such people, however, he or she must be circumspect
in dealing with such people in order not to be rather influenced by them as the
scripture warns us in 1 Corinthians 10:12. “So, if you think that you are
standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall.”
To sum it all up, let us consider this verse in 1
Corinthians 15:33, “do not be misled:
“Bad company corrupts good morals””
Written by: Michael Boateng
